Sitting with my Bestfriend in the Library

At 11.07 I sit with my bestfriend at school. She always encourage me whenever I am down and trapped in boring zone. We have the same passion about students and vision in education. Sometimes, I don't agree with her opinion but somehow.... I don't know.... her opinions trigger a lot my conscience toward myself. Beside her, I contemplate a lot about God's love, even she has her own struggle about it. But her spirit is like sparkle in the dark.... we spend our time together, our last time in Petra together. Thanks God for giving her in this chapter of my life. She cheers me up.... she makes my life both complicated and simple... just remember the way she laughed, I can move on.
Bless her.....
Love her....
Thank you bu Juanita ♡♥

Leader or Boss?

Pagi-pagi sekali saat berangkat kerja, kumulai hari ini dengan berkeluh kesah dan berharap semua ini segera berlalu.... tidak enak memang, hanya saja setiap peristiwa kubawa dalam kekesalanku. Fight the good fight of faith inikah yang sedang kulalui? This is not agood fight anymore with my worst attitude I have.
Then, I saw her there.... she is the city major, ibu Risma. Seeing her working on the city garden in taman Bungkul.... makes me super shocked and ashamed....
God, bless her.... bless her in everything, in her work, decision and her own life privately. God, forgive me.... I don't have such great attitude. That's the real good fight of faith. She is the leader, not the boss. She is the mother of the city. The leader  takes care.... the boss only says what to do but not involve. Today I learn to be modest and humble. Being a leader in my life is not about showing the best in everything but showing surrender in everything. Thank you Lord, thank you bu Risma.

The Only Decision

Tidak semua keputusan aku sesali, tapi satu keptusan ini yg berbeda. Bukannya aku sesali tapi lebih kurang ini soal bagaimana aku memandang diriku bercermin dari keputusan ini. Mereka yg merasa punya kedudukan seakan-akan meletakkanaku di tangan mereka. Tapi aku, aku tautempatku berdiri.
Hari ini putriku yg sulung, melihat bagaiman beratnya langkahku untuk menyelesaikan jalanyg tersisa. Tapi setiap pagi dia selalu berkata.... "aku bisa mengerti perasaan ibu, tapi jangan kuatir... tinggal beberapa minggu lagi!"
Satu yang aku harapkan, lepas dari semua ini aku bisa terbebas.....
Aku ingin bebaskan jiwaku dari institusi itu.
Aku tidak bermasalah dengan otoritas.... hanya saja otoritas yang tidak membumi, membuatku sesak....
Otoritas yang mendewakan sistem, adalah otoritas yg otoriter....
Otoritas yang membanggakan ketundukan bawahannya adalah otoritas yg menyangkali hakekatnya sendiri, karena tanpa bawahannya.... he is NOTHING.
Jadi, apa aku masih harus bertahan?
Tidak ada alasan....

Hanya Dia, otoritas sejatiku.... Kristus ku!